What is negotiation? It is a discussion aimed at reaching an agreement between two opposing parties.
Negotiation is an art and a science. Art because it requires some abstract thoughts and deliberation before taking a decision. Like an art, a conversation evolves into a well oiled machine to speed up to maximum speed in no time or conversely drag the talking train into a quick sand.
It is up to the negotiators to make sure that the talking train and the relationships are effectively massaged to deliver the appropriate output. Each and every action in our day-to-day life is a negotiation. Some are between the Master creator and our souls, while some are between human souls interacting to produce a feasible solution. It is a means to making a bigger, bolder decision in the scheme of life.
We can use different colors and patterns in our art class canvas. We can do the same with the negotiation tactics. No wonder there are so many books on “crucial conversations” and “Think before you Speak!” to name a few.
Think is a critical point to look at.
- T stands for:- is it true?,
- H stands for: is it helpful?
- I stands for: is it inspiring?
- N stands for: is it necessary?
- K stands for: is it kind?
After deciding if it is worthwhile bringing in this idea, speak it out to your opponent. If it is a true fact that you narrated, the opponent will be obliging to your request. You would have won that conversation! Conversely if your idea had a flaw the opponent would have won.
Take, for instance, a kid, who is an excellent negotiator, deciding what to eat and read with his mom. The mom wants to read the entire book before the kid goes to bed. The kid wants to eat chips before going to bed. Reading is not even there in his mind. He successfully negotiates with the mom saying, “I will eat one chip and read one page until the end of the book and then go to bed.” He has cleverly manipulated the mom to provide what he needs while satisfying the mom’s request.
It is a science because experiments with negotiation can produce completely different results. A peace negotiator can trigger thoughts of war in the opponent. Thoughts do matter! Always strive for the best of the worst and the worst of the best! Anything in the extremes is a win-win because corner cases are handled! The words already uttered cannot be taken back just like the writing on the wall cannot be erased!
Women L.E.A.D. Toastmasters encourages participants to come out of their comfort zone and successfully negotiate their way into their dream positions!
See you at our next meeting on Wednesday, Feb 17th, 7-8:15pm PST. Theme: Negotiation
Written by Priya Shastri, Women L.E.A.D. Toastmasters VP of Membership